sonic the hedgehog was at 7-eleven. im sorry but its the truth. he bought 4 gallons of milk and refused to tell anybody why. the fuck did he need all that milk for? like for real. his friend tails was all like, "sonic, what the fuck?" but sonic wouldnt talk. he just stared his twin-tail buddy dead in the eyes and kept walking with all that milk. my skin is crawling just thinking about it. this is a horror story. sonic, walking a hazy stupor, as if dragged by some unseen force, handed his card to the gas station guy at the counter. tails, shocked by the almost robotic movements of his friend, just didnt fucking know how to react. shadow, objectively the sexiest sonic character said, "aw boi what da hell boi" and SMACCED sonky the chogger upside the downside of his dynamite heddy. that was when the milk fucking exploded all over the 7/11 sad times for whoever had to clean that shit up. revolver ocelot was the one who had to clean it. he did a sad meow. tails realized that each gallon of milk had its own BOMB STRAPPED TO IT WHAAAAT and that sonic went super fast and hid the milks in different place??? and now he was acting like he didnt know what was going on. tails wondered if he should like say smoething or just go along with what his friend was doing. just then, in came the final boss, MILK JAGGER!!!! and he had the moves. and the runs. uh oh, stinky!!!! okay, tails knew how to deal with this kind of shit. he jsut took a video on his iphone of sonic doing the spinny zoom thing where he does and beats the hell out of these other guys and its super fucking awesome lmao but all tails got on his phone was some blurry camera footage smh. stupid BITCH!!! dumb fuck!!! useless. knuckles was there too he was smoking weed. he was toootally stoooned and super unehlpful. "KNUCKLES WHAT THE HELL DO SOMETHING COOL FOR THE TWITCH STREAM" tails yelled like a bastard. knuckles proceeded to do something majorly sickwicked, but unfortunately he did it for the vine and not the twitch. what was it that he did, god only knows. the tails was toootally pissed off now what sonic was busy kicking ass in the background and he could barely see anything!!! then uhhh one of the milks fucking exploded lolll. two milks left. TWO. MILKS. REMAINING. dr eggbitch blarsted all up ins the 7-eleven and did an ad read for burger king. he recieved moderate applause when he was done. i mean, BK... what a get!